So, my family is not the "norm". When the time came, I had the better paying job, so Brady was the stay at home dad. When the cost of daycare outweighed the income, we decided he would stay at home with the kids. Our stereo typical gender roles were swapped. I was the one who brought home the bacon, he was the one who cooked it. Brady took care of the house and the kids. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am sooo not domesticated. I can’t cook. *Gasp* I know, a woman who doesn’t cook! Well Brady became the cook of the family as well. He would have dinner ready for when I got home from work. This is what my kids got used to as the "norm".
I was at Church on Father’s Day (I know, gasping again! - it was for my kids at the request of my SIL.) Well I was slightly offended by a poem my SIL read to the congregation about Father’s and how they provide for the family. I am the provider for my family. I pay the bills, put the food (that Brady cooks) on the table, and take care of all our needs. I know there are many single Moms out there and even some Stay at Home Dads. The world is changing, and I had the proof thrown up in my face two nights ago.
I was talking with my 7 year old daughter. I don’t remember what exactly brought it up, but she said, when she gets older, she will come visit me all the time. I told her she can come visit me anytime she wants. Well she said, "when can I come?" So I told her she could "come cook me dinner on Sunday after Church." (She is the Church go-er.) She made this awkward face, and said, "Oh I don’t know, I guess I will have to bring my husband." To which I burst out laughing! She thought it was the Man that does the cooking! This made me think of Women’s Lib at work in the extreme! It was all she has known. She was not spoiled with the old way of thinking that a woman’s place is in the home, preparing meals for her man. She thought it totally natural that the man be able to prepare the food, and assumed she would not know how to cook! I re-assured her that Daddy would teach her to cook, and by then she would know how, and she could cook me dinner. (Or that I would gladly let her husband cook it, if that be the situation for her!)
Some might think this atrocious, and to them I say again, the world is changing. I have not forced any liberal thoughts on my child. I simply raised her in a house where we made it work for us. Someone needed to take care of the home and the children, and my husband was the better option at the time, financially. I am proud to be able to provide for my family, and break traditional gender roles. It paves the way for further change. Long live the Man Cookers of the world! Love you Chloë!!
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Horrible Hurricane Gustav
Ok, for those of you who actually don't know, we lost our house in Gustav. Here is the story:
I wrote this on March 3rd, 2010
Hurricane Gustav hit Louisiana September 1, 2008. It shattered our lives at 3:04 am on September 4, 2008.
After Katrina, which we made it through with only the loss of our kitchen, roof, and trees, we didn’t think Gustav would be that bad.
Boy were we wrong. Living in a flood zone definitely sucks. The bad part about it, the flood could have been avoided. Our neighborhood flooded due to poor drainage in a blocked canal, that the city should have been able to prevent. We made it through the hurricane, and waited for the water to come. We had no power, but stayed at the house since we had a gas stove, and had prepared for the black-out to come if the power was out again for extended time periods, like during Katrina. Lot of good that did us. The night of the flood, we sat in the (sunken) livingroom, and waited. As it got darker, it was more and more difficult to see the water. It slowly crept up the back yard. Once night fell, we could only tell where the water was by catching a glimpse of a reflection of the moonlight. I went to bed at 10 pm, when it had not yet reached the back patio.
I remember bugging Brady every few minutes, ‘are you going to move the big screen tv?" He kept saying, "I will if the water comes in." Every 20 minutes we would repeat this fight. Finally, after being so annoyed by me, he agreed to move the tv. He picked it up and put it in the higher part of the house, in the office. There wasn’t much left in the sunken livingroom. I had moved out most of the furniture that I could. We had the couch, the Big Boy recliner, and a futon mattress. Since the power was out and the heat was unbearable, Brady was sleeping on the futon mattress on the floor, in front of the back door. We had a screen on it, but it was the only source of air-flow for the room, since the wall to wall windows did not open.
At 3:04 I awoke to hear Brady grunting. When I yelled from the bedroom to inquire what he was doing, I was jolted up by his response. He was attempting to move the Big Boy recliner by himself, to the higher part of the house in the hallway "to get it out of the water!" What I saw amazed me. The living room was full of water. We had slept through our house filling with 3 feet of water. Apparently, Brady woke up when the futon mattress had floated across the room, hit the wall, and knocked his hand over the edge into the water. The couch and mattress were goners. But he was trying to save the recliner. I hurriedly ran into the kids room to gather what I could; clothes, shoes, etc. The water was coming in fast now, getting higher every minute. We had parked the truck under the carport, so it was flooded along with everything in the garage. I had recently moved my car to near the kitchen door. I figured it didn’t need to stay under the carport now that the winds had stopped. Thank goodness for that. The Kia had not yet flooded, but was getting closer. Brady grabbed the hurricane supplies, and clothes I was throwing into any container I could find.
When Chloë woke up, she was curious. I told her we were going to Nanna’s house. She was excited. Since she was awake and it was dark, I put her in the recliner (that was blocking the middle of the hallway.) "What’s that Mama?" she said about the water in the livingroom. "It’s water, baby." I told her. While I was going back and forth from Tate’s room packing, she apparently conversed with Brady as he was loading the car. At first, she was excited and wanted to go in the water, until Brady explained what else might be in the water. "You’re gonna pick me up, right Mama? You’re gonna carry me through that, right Mama?" she asked over and over. I assured her I would. We passed off the kids into the car. Brady tried to hurry me even more. Walking through the water in the living room was scarey. Who knew what snakes and other nasties were in there. As I made it to the kitchen, almost out the door, I saw all our photo albums, scrapbooks, and memories on the bottom shelf in the office. I dared ask how much longer I had. Brady gave me 30 seconds. I threw them all up as high as I could find surfaces - desks, washing machine, etc. There was just no hope, nor anymore time, for anything else that remained on the floor. Right as I jumped in the front seat of the car, the water came in on the floorboards as I shut the door. We slowly made our way out of the neighborhood, on our way to Mary’s house. The city was under curfew, so it was like a ghost town. I think, at the time, we were just glad to get out before it was too late. It didn’t really sink in yet, that my house was under water.
The next morning Brady and James went to the house to pick up anything that was not yet destroyed by the water. Due to the different heights of the various areas in the house, not too much was lost. Besides, I had insurance, so I felt secure. (Boy was that stupid.)
The water stayed in the house for 3 days. When it finally drained, we returned to assess the situation. We threw out the furniture and ruined items, taking pictures of everything. We bought a ton of rubber boots and gloves, and Bryan’s family came to help us tear out the wetness. The insurance company assured me that we were responsible for removing everything the water touched, 6 inches above the water line, to prevent further damage, from mold, etc. We ripped out the carpet, drywall, and wood paneled walls. However, it kept raining. And apparently, the roof kept leaking. After being gone for several days, we had no idea the entire house was covered in mold from the water coming from the top of the house! Every wall, ceiling, everything was covered in mold. The shifting of the water coming in so fast, had eroded away at the piers under the house, and it shifted, causing large cracks in the mortar of the exterior brick. The windows and doors were all out of alignment. The wood sub-flooring was warped and ruined as well. When all was said and done, we had to remove everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, but the exterior brick walls.
We demolished the walls and ceilings, some wall studs, all flooring, all cabinetry and shelving. It was all a loss. The house was a brick shell on top of dirt. The insurance was a mess! Anything damaged by the flood water was not covered under the Homeowners Insurance. Anything damaged by the mold from the leaky roof, was not covered under the Flood Insurance. It was a total nightmare. We had two insurance claims, a FEMA claim, and I think I stopped counting at over 14 adjusters. The lovely new hurricane deductible took a large bite out of the coverage. Not to mention we did not have contents coverage under the flood policy, only the homeowner’s policy. Back and forth, arguing over who would pay for what, if it would even be paid for at all. So, two deductibles, and then comes recoverable depreciation. Oh how I love that I NOW understand how to properly insure your house.
A Lesson on recoverable depreciation - you must insure your house for 80-100% of the COST to rebuild your house, or you suffer from non-recoverable depreciation. Now, don’t think of depreciation like you would your car, because keep in mind, we had a new roof and kitchen from Katrina from 2005. Age doesn’t matter. :) The current cost to rebuild a home in Baton Rouge, at the time, was $80-100 per square foot. So what this means is, our 1790 square foot home should have been insured for 80-100% of $100 x 1790. However, we were only insured for ten thousand over the cost of our home. So, we lost about $20,000 to non-recoverable depreciation.
Contractors would come through the front door of our house, take a look around, and say, "I’m sorry but I can’t help you." We figured it this way, one contractor could get several roofs done in the time they would spend remodeling our entire house. They saw the loss of one big contract better than the possibility of completing several small contracts. So, we started to find subcontractors for each area that needed work.
Our flooring contractor went to jail for drugs. Our roofing contractor(s) never showed up for their appointments and never came back. It was looking hopeless. In the mean time, I had so much contact with the adjusters and insurance company, our file grew larger and larger. After about a month, the insurance paid for us to move out of Mary’s upstairs oven. (I call it the oven because it is sooo hot up there!) We moved into a small two bedroom apartment across town. With only one car, private school pre-k for the kids, and cross town traffic, it was just a lovely situation all around.
Finally, there was a light at the end of the tunnel, or so we thought at the time. One of the contractors, that actually kept his appointment, not only did roofs, but was willing to take on the entire house. Oh we thought Brandon, of Wilson Construction, was just an answer to everything. It was now nearing the holidays and nothing was done to the house. It was just demolished. Brady and Chrissy had spent over 8 hours a day demolishing everything. Removing sheet rock, flooring, joists, wall studs, everything in the house that was damaged, which was basically everything. We could not begin any repair work until a structural engineer was assigned to review the foundation situation. (To determine just how the insurance company could get out of paying that $30,000.00) So it sat, and waited.
We did get the roof repaired pretty fast - they finished it in two days. However, they did it wrong! They covered up rotten wood instead of replacing it, even though we had the money to replace it. We later found out from the Mexican Roofers that Brandon told them to do it that way, there was no money for new wood. He told us he would take care of it all when we did the rest of the remodel. That never happened. And the roof continued to leak in areas.
We fought with the insurance companies, FEMA, adjusters, contractors, everyone. The file grew so large, that over time, the repeated picking up and down motion, caused pain in my arm. The file grew to a briefcase. The briefcase grew to a box. The pain grew unbearable. Thanksgiving came and went, and we had to part ways with our contractor. He wouldn’t do anything. He would not submit things to the insurance company. He just wanted to raise the price, and charge outrageous amounts for the work we needed done. I was educated by now, on how much everything should cost, will cost, and how much was going to be paid for by the insurance company. Christmas came and passed, still no progress from Brandon. We agreed to part ways. He had repaired the roof, but that was it. Brady and Chrissy had done ALL the demo on the house, waiting for Brandon to get his butt in gear. Which, it turns out, Brandon did not repair the roof properly. So, now that the roof was paid for and replaced, it needed to be redone. Out of pocket. We tried to file a claim against the contractor, but he disappeared. Turns out he was not licensed, as he assured us he was. And he was out of state. Gone with the wind. Another one bites the dust.
The engineer finally did come out, and took almost a month to submit his report. Then, the insurance company argued with him. In the end, he stated that only 3% of the damage to the structure was due to the flood. So, despite the fact that the rushing water picked up the house and set it back down, we were going to get no assistance for any repairs for that.
Oh wait, I forgot all about the electricians! Yes, the electricians that Brandon sent to re-wire the house. They (repeatedly) cut the tag on the meter, and we had to contact the power company so we would not be fined. They installed the box in the wrong place, and cut a hole in the exterior of my house. They put the plugs in the wrong places, switches at wrong heights, etc. In one room, they even managed to put the light switch on the wrong side of the door. So, that was another fun unnecessary experience trying to find a motion censored light that would come on once the door was opened. (Fastest, easiest and cheapest fix since we had already purchased the new doors.) We had to re-wire almost everything they did. Out of pocket. Lots of thanks to Matt for helping out with the electricity!
The air conditioner man, again, someone of Brandon’s, installed the duct work and interior unit, but said he would wait until we moved into the house to install the vents and exterior unit. We never heard from him again. Did I mention that he put the ducts in the wrong place as well?
We paid anyone who would, to repair our house. Brady and Chrissy did most of the work after the sub contractors bailed on an incomplete inaccurate job. My sister and her friend pitched in. Matt became our electrician. Mary helped paint trim and doors, cabinets and molding. Anyone and everyone lent us a hand, for which we are so very thankful. By January, we were ready for drywall.
No wait, let me stop here. See, since the entire house was a shell, Brandon decided we were going to rearrange the layout of the house, and take the sunken living room and patio area, and turn it into a master suite. We re-worked the existing three bedrooms and office into a livingroom, and two bedrooms. We combined the original master bath and existing bath, into one larger bathroom. Everything was ready, except the master suite, because the roof still had to be fixed, where Brandon had sloppily done a bad job. Money was getting tight, and time was running out.
With the exception of the roof and the master suite, the house was getting finished. The insurance company decided they would no longer pay for the apartment, and we had to move back into the house in February. That is where the fight with the mortgage company came in. They had not yet released all the funds that the insurance company had sent. We still had no appliances, and no heat!
Oh yeah, did I mention that I was getting steroid shots in my arm for the pain for several months? From picking up all the documentation regarding the stupid hurricane claim(s). And how could I forget to mention, we were robbed! Literally. Right at the new year, someone broke into the house, and stole over $4,000 worth of construction materials and tools. They stole all the hardwood flooring, but left the tiles. Stole all the light fixtures, faucets, fans, 13 gallons of colored paint. (Who wanted Chloë’s Tinkerbell Purple and Green, I really would like to know.) They even managed to steal the bathtub! So now we had yet another claim, a theft claim. Luckily, due to all the documentation I had to carry on a daily basis, that claim was relatively easy for us. We had all the receipts, and lists of item numbers and stores, etc. It was smooth, except for another $1,000 deductible. So, we went shopping, again. Rented more delivery trucks, bought everything all over again. Happy happy joy joy.
Ok, so I fought with the mortgage company, and we were able to get appliances, and heat! The family came over for a painting party, and we were able to get the entire house painted in just a few hours. We moved back into the house in March. The roof still leaked. The master suite still did not exist. The finishing touches were not done - you know, like counter tops, doors, vents, etc. Once we moved in, Chrissy retired as a contractor/construction worker, and Matt took her place. Several months went by. Over the summer, we hired my sister’s ex-husband to put on a new roof, yes, ANOTHER new roof. However, we never got to the shingles. I moved into the area still not even started, for the master suite. I had plastic for a ceiling, plywood for wall, concrete for floors, and space heaters.
The house remained this way since Brady took on a construction job repairing the neighbors house. All work on our house came to a stop. He, Matt, and James worked on the house across the street. Destany became our summer nanny and we took the kids out of pre-k, to help save on costs. Brady ended up getting screwed out of $13,000 on the repair work for the neighbor in the long run, and I was spending my money left and right. I emptied out my retirement fund to pay for the second roof (second from Gustav, third if you count Katrina.) I borrowed money from a friend to pay for appliances when we were forced to move into the house early. There simply was no more money anywhere.
Once school started up, we were back to paying private school tuition for both kids, with only my income. It was just not possible to continue on that way, the money was just not there. It was Christmas yet again, and the house was still at a stand still. We had no more money, no shingles, a leaking roof, no new concrete, no new walls or ceiling. The dumpster has been in the driveway/yard/driveway since day one, and to this day, remains there. They won’t come pick it up. With no money to finish the house, no real hope to ever be able to finish the house, and just despair at living in a worsening situation, I made the call. We moved to Zachary into a rental house in February. A completed, finished, new house. No leaky roof. No dumpster in the driveway. No private school costs. No plywood walls. I love it. We were trying to work with the mortgage company and sell the house, but no agent would list it. We had to strip out everything we could sell - cabinets, light fixtures, etc. No one wants to touch this house. And the mold most certainly came back, everywhere, from the leaky roof.
Oh yeah, the arm pain. So, after a year of doctor’s visits, etc., it was determined that I tore a tendon in my arm. I had to have an MRI on my arm. After the MRI, the doctor said I shouldn’t NEED to have surgery to repair it, but gave me one last steroid shot. As temporary as it was, the steroids helped the arm pain. However, they created a new problem, and still haven’t healed the arm pain. So, I am still living with limited use of my right arm, constant pain, and now a new health issue - insulin resistance. The repeated injections of steroids caused me to become severely insulin resistant. (Pre-diabetic.) I have limited use of my right arm, can’t lift anything, and it still hurts. I take medication for it three times a day. Not to mention the medication I have to take for the insulin resistance!
So, not only did the hurricane effect our house, my health, the lives of almost everyone in our family and those family and friends that helped, and housed us, I am saying goodbye to the money pit that Gustav brought into our lives.
The one memory that will live on forever in my mind was Tate’s speech. I think I recorded him and sent it to everyone:
Gin - "Why can’t we go home?"
Tate - "Because it’s yucky!"
Gin - "Why is it yucky?"
Tate - "Because the waters come."
Gin -"What brought the water?"
Tate- "The Hurricane."
Gin - "What’s the hurricane’s name?"
Tate - "Gustav!"
I wrote this on March 3rd, 2010
Hurricane Gustav hit Louisiana September 1, 2008. It shattered our lives at 3:04 am on September 4, 2008.
After Katrina, which we made it through with only the loss of our kitchen, roof, and trees, we didn’t think Gustav would be that bad.
Boy were we wrong. Living in a flood zone definitely sucks. The bad part about it, the flood could have been avoided. Our neighborhood flooded due to poor drainage in a blocked canal, that the city should have been able to prevent. We made it through the hurricane, and waited for the water to come. We had no power, but stayed at the house since we had a gas stove, and had prepared for the black-out to come if the power was out again for extended time periods, like during Katrina. Lot of good that did us. The night of the flood, we sat in the (sunken) livingroom, and waited. As it got darker, it was more and more difficult to see the water. It slowly crept up the back yard. Once night fell, we could only tell where the water was by catching a glimpse of a reflection of the moonlight. I went to bed at 10 pm, when it had not yet reached the back patio.
I remember bugging Brady every few minutes, ‘are you going to move the big screen tv?" He kept saying, "I will if the water comes in." Every 20 minutes we would repeat this fight. Finally, after being so annoyed by me, he agreed to move the tv. He picked it up and put it in the higher part of the house, in the office. There wasn’t much left in the sunken livingroom. I had moved out most of the furniture that I could. We had the couch, the Big Boy recliner, and a futon mattress. Since the power was out and the heat was unbearable, Brady was sleeping on the futon mattress on the floor, in front of the back door. We had a screen on it, but it was the only source of air-flow for the room, since the wall to wall windows did not open.
At 3:04 I awoke to hear Brady grunting. When I yelled from the bedroom to inquire what he was doing, I was jolted up by his response. He was attempting to move the Big Boy recliner by himself, to the higher part of the house in the hallway "to get it out of the water!" What I saw amazed me. The living room was full of water. We had slept through our house filling with 3 feet of water. Apparently, Brady woke up when the futon mattress had floated across the room, hit the wall, and knocked his hand over the edge into the water. The couch and mattress were goners. But he was trying to save the recliner. I hurriedly ran into the kids room to gather what I could; clothes, shoes, etc. The water was coming in fast now, getting higher every minute. We had parked the truck under the carport, so it was flooded along with everything in the garage. I had recently moved my car to near the kitchen door. I figured it didn’t need to stay under the carport now that the winds had stopped. Thank goodness for that. The Kia had not yet flooded, but was getting closer. Brady grabbed the hurricane supplies, and clothes I was throwing into any container I could find.
When Chloë woke up, she was curious. I told her we were going to Nanna’s house. She was excited. Since she was awake and it was dark, I put her in the recliner (that was blocking the middle of the hallway.) "What’s that Mama?" she said about the water in the livingroom. "It’s water, baby." I told her. While I was going back and forth from Tate’s room packing, she apparently conversed with Brady as he was loading the car. At first, she was excited and wanted to go in the water, until Brady explained what else might be in the water. "You’re gonna pick me up, right Mama? You’re gonna carry me through that, right Mama?" she asked over and over. I assured her I would. We passed off the kids into the car. Brady tried to hurry me even more. Walking through the water in the living room was scarey. Who knew what snakes and other nasties were in there. As I made it to the kitchen, almost out the door, I saw all our photo albums, scrapbooks, and memories on the bottom shelf in the office. I dared ask how much longer I had. Brady gave me 30 seconds. I threw them all up as high as I could find surfaces - desks, washing machine, etc. There was just no hope, nor anymore time, for anything else that remained on the floor. Right as I jumped in the front seat of the car, the water came in on the floorboards as I shut the door. We slowly made our way out of the neighborhood, on our way to Mary’s house. The city was under curfew, so it was like a ghost town. I think, at the time, we were just glad to get out before it was too late. It didn’t really sink in yet, that my house was under water.
The next morning Brady and James went to the house to pick up anything that was not yet destroyed by the water. Due to the different heights of the various areas in the house, not too much was lost. Besides, I had insurance, so I felt secure. (Boy was that stupid.)
The water stayed in the house for 3 days. When it finally drained, we returned to assess the situation. We threw out the furniture and ruined items, taking pictures of everything. We bought a ton of rubber boots and gloves, and Bryan’s family came to help us tear out the wetness. The insurance company assured me that we were responsible for removing everything the water touched, 6 inches above the water line, to prevent further damage, from mold, etc. We ripped out the carpet, drywall, and wood paneled walls. However, it kept raining. And apparently, the roof kept leaking. After being gone for several days, we had no idea the entire house was covered in mold from the water coming from the top of the house! Every wall, ceiling, everything was covered in mold. The shifting of the water coming in so fast, had eroded away at the piers under the house, and it shifted, causing large cracks in the mortar of the exterior brick. The windows and doors were all out of alignment. The wood sub-flooring was warped and ruined as well. When all was said and done, we had to remove everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, but the exterior brick walls.
We demolished the walls and ceilings, some wall studs, all flooring, all cabinetry and shelving. It was all a loss. The house was a brick shell on top of dirt. The insurance was a mess! Anything damaged by the flood water was not covered under the Homeowners Insurance. Anything damaged by the mold from the leaky roof, was not covered under the Flood Insurance. It was a total nightmare. We had two insurance claims, a FEMA claim, and I think I stopped counting at over 14 adjusters. The lovely new hurricane deductible took a large bite out of the coverage. Not to mention we did not have contents coverage under the flood policy, only the homeowner’s policy. Back and forth, arguing over who would pay for what, if it would even be paid for at all. So, two deductibles, and then comes recoverable depreciation. Oh how I love that I NOW understand how to properly insure your house.
Contractors would come through the front door of our house, take a look around, and say, "I’m sorry but I can’t help you." We figured it this way, one contractor could get several roofs done in the time they would spend remodeling our entire house. They saw the loss of one big contract better than the possibility of completing several small contracts. So, we started to find subcontractors for each area that needed work.
Our flooring contractor went to jail for drugs. Our roofing contractor(s) never showed up for their appointments and never came back. It was looking hopeless. In the mean time, I had so much contact with the adjusters and insurance company, our file grew larger and larger. After about a month, the insurance paid for us to move out of Mary’s upstairs oven. (I call it the oven because it is sooo hot up there!) We moved into a small two bedroom apartment across town. With only one car, private school pre-k for the kids, and cross town traffic, it was just a lovely situation all around.
Finally, there was a light at the end of the tunnel, or so we thought at the time. One of the contractors, that actually kept his appointment, not only did roofs, but was willing to take on the entire house. Oh we thought Brandon, of Wilson Construction, was just an answer to everything. It was now nearing the holidays and nothing was done to the house. It was just demolished. Brady and Chrissy had spent over 8 hours a day demolishing everything. Removing sheet rock, flooring, joists, wall studs, everything in the house that was damaged, which was basically everything. We could not begin any repair work until a structural engineer was assigned to review the foundation situation. (To determine just how the insurance company could get out of paying that $30,000.00) So it sat, and waited.
We did get the roof repaired pretty fast - they finished it in two days. However, they did it wrong! They covered up rotten wood instead of replacing it, even though we had the money to replace it. We later found out from the Mexican Roofers that Brandon told them to do it that way, there was no money for new wood. He told us he would take care of it all when we did the rest of the remodel. That never happened. And the roof continued to leak in areas.
We fought with the insurance companies, FEMA, adjusters, contractors, everyone. The file grew so large, that over time, the repeated picking up and down motion, caused pain in my arm. The file grew to a briefcase. The briefcase grew to a box. The pain grew unbearable. Thanksgiving came and went, and we had to part ways with our contractor. He wouldn’t do anything. He would not submit things to the insurance company. He just wanted to raise the price, and charge outrageous amounts for the work we needed done. I was educated by now, on how much everything should cost, will cost, and how much was going to be paid for by the insurance company. Christmas came and passed, still no progress from Brandon. We agreed to part ways. He had repaired the roof, but that was it. Brady and Chrissy had done ALL the demo on the house, waiting for Brandon to get his butt in gear. Which, it turns out, Brandon did not repair the roof properly. So, now that the roof was paid for and replaced, it needed to be redone. Out of pocket. We tried to file a claim against the contractor, but he disappeared. Turns out he was not licensed, as he assured us he was. And he was out of state. Gone with the wind. Another one bites the dust.
The engineer finally did come out, and took almost a month to submit his report. Then, the insurance company argued with him. In the end, he stated that only 3% of the damage to the structure was due to the flood. So, despite the fact that the rushing water picked up the house and set it back down, we were going to get no assistance for any repairs for that.
Oh wait, I forgot all about the electricians! Yes, the electricians that Brandon sent to re-wire the house. They (repeatedly) cut the tag on the meter, and we had to contact the power company so we would not be fined. They installed the box in the wrong place, and cut a hole in the exterior of my house. They put the plugs in the wrong places, switches at wrong heights, etc. In one room, they even managed to put the light switch on the wrong side of the door. So, that was another fun unnecessary experience trying to find a motion censored light that would come on once the door was opened. (Fastest, easiest and cheapest fix since we had already purchased the new doors.) We had to re-wire almost everything they did. Out of pocket. Lots of thanks to Matt for helping out with the electricity!
The air conditioner man, again, someone of Brandon’s, installed the duct work and interior unit, but said he would wait until we moved into the house to install the vents and exterior unit. We never heard from him again. Did I mention that he put the ducts in the wrong place as well?
We paid anyone who would, to repair our house. Brady and Chrissy did most of the work after the sub contractors bailed on an incomplete inaccurate job. My sister and her friend pitched in. Matt became our electrician. Mary helped paint trim and doors, cabinets and molding. Anyone and everyone lent us a hand, for which we are so very thankful. By January, we were ready for drywall.
No wait, let me stop here. See, since the entire house was a shell, Brandon decided we were going to rearrange the layout of the house, and take the sunken living room and patio area, and turn it into a master suite. We re-worked the existing three bedrooms and office into a livingroom, and two bedrooms. We combined the original master bath and existing bath, into one larger bathroom. Everything was ready, except the master suite, because the roof still had to be fixed, where Brandon had sloppily done a bad job. Money was getting tight, and time was running out.
With the exception of the roof and the master suite, the house was getting finished. The insurance company decided they would no longer pay for the apartment, and we had to move back into the house in February. That is where the fight with the mortgage company came in. They had not yet released all the funds that the insurance company had sent. We still had no appliances, and no heat!
Oh yeah, did I mention that I was getting steroid shots in my arm for the pain for several months? From picking up all the documentation regarding the stupid hurricane claim(s). And how could I forget to mention, we were robbed! Literally. Right at the new year, someone broke into the house, and stole over $4,000 worth of construction materials and tools. They stole all the hardwood flooring, but left the tiles. Stole all the light fixtures, faucets, fans, 13 gallons of colored paint. (Who wanted Chloë’s Tinkerbell Purple and Green, I really would like to know.) They even managed to steal the bathtub! So now we had yet another claim, a theft claim. Luckily, due to all the documentation I had to carry on a daily basis, that claim was relatively easy for us. We had all the receipts, and lists of item numbers and stores, etc. It was smooth, except for another $1,000 deductible. So, we went shopping, again. Rented more delivery trucks, bought everything all over again. Happy happy joy joy.
Ok, so I fought with the mortgage company, and we were able to get appliances, and heat! The family came over for a painting party, and we were able to get the entire house painted in just a few hours. We moved back into the house in March. The roof still leaked. The master suite still did not exist. The finishing touches were not done - you know, like counter tops, doors, vents, etc. Once we moved in, Chrissy retired as a contractor/construction worker, and Matt took her place. Several months went by. Over the summer, we hired my sister’s ex-husband to put on a new roof, yes, ANOTHER new roof. However, we never got to the shingles. I moved into the area still not even started, for the master suite. I had plastic for a ceiling, plywood for wall, concrete for floors, and space heaters.
The house remained this way since Brady took on a construction job repairing the neighbors house. All work on our house came to a stop. He, Matt, and James worked on the house across the street. Destany became our summer nanny and we took the kids out of pre-k, to help save on costs. Brady ended up getting screwed out of $13,000 on the repair work for the neighbor in the long run, and I was spending my money left and right. I emptied out my retirement fund to pay for the second roof (second from Gustav, third if you count Katrina.) I borrowed money from a friend to pay for appliances when we were forced to move into the house early. There simply was no more money anywhere.
Once school started up, we were back to paying private school tuition for both kids, with only my income. It was just not possible to continue on that way, the money was just not there. It was Christmas yet again, and the house was still at a stand still. We had no more money, no shingles, a leaking roof, no new concrete, no new walls or ceiling. The dumpster has been in the driveway/yard/driveway since day one, and to this day, remains there. They won’t come pick it up. With no money to finish the house, no real hope to ever be able to finish the house, and just despair at living in a worsening situation, I made the call. We moved to Zachary into a rental house in February. A completed, finished, new house. No leaky roof. No dumpster in the driveway. No private school costs. No plywood walls. I love it. We were trying to work with the mortgage company and sell the house, but no agent would list it. We had to strip out everything we could sell - cabinets, light fixtures, etc. No one wants to touch this house. And the mold most certainly came back, everywhere, from the leaky roof.
Oh yeah, the arm pain. So, after a year of doctor’s visits, etc., it was determined that I tore a tendon in my arm. I had to have an MRI on my arm. After the MRI, the doctor said I shouldn’t NEED to have surgery to repair it, but gave me one last steroid shot. As temporary as it was, the steroids helped the arm pain. However, they created a new problem, and still haven’t healed the arm pain. So, I am still living with limited use of my right arm, constant pain, and now a new health issue - insulin resistance. The repeated injections of steroids caused me to become severely insulin resistant. (Pre-diabetic.) I have limited use of my right arm, can’t lift anything, and it still hurts. I take medication for it three times a day. Not to mention the medication I have to take for the insulin resistance!
So, not only did the hurricane effect our house, my health, the lives of almost everyone in our family and those family and friends that helped, and housed us, I am saying goodbye to the money pit that Gustav brought into our lives.
The one memory that will live on forever in my mind was Tate’s speech. I think I recorded him and sent it to everyone:
Gin - "Why can’t we go home?"
Tate - "Because it’s yucky!"
Gin - "Why is it yucky?"
Tate - "Because the waters come."
Gin -"What brought the water?"
Tate- "The Hurricane."
Gin - "What’s the hurricane’s name?"
Tate - "Gustav!"
Friday, June 3, 2011
Driving Off Cliffs
Our large, dysfunctional family, has large age gaps amongst the siblings. So, since I am stuck in the middle, this is my one memory that contained all (full blooded, not halved, not stepped, not adopted) members of my immediate family. We have discussed over the years, and mentioned often, the Driving Off The Cliff Incident. So here is my attempt to get everyone’s point of view, of Driving Off The Cliff Incident.
I sent out the message:
If you were involved, or even if you weren't, please tell me your version of the time Kellie and Katie drove off a cliff. Be detailed :)
Some foreknowledge :Katie = Kathy -14 yrs Kellie - 15 yrs Dori - 12 yrs Gin=Ginny - 7 yrs David - One-ish
Here is what I got in response:
Katie Fuller
Katie Fuller: I don’t remember that?????
Mom:
Dad:
Kellie:
Dori:
Ok, so the cliff was 15 feet, 30 feet, 40 feet, or 50-60 feet down the mountain. Dad was both in front of the car, and following the car. There was another man who carried someone up the cliff. The cliff was located in cutoff highway Hwy 6, I think, between Springfield and Green River, or somewhere hours from Ogden , somewhere near Green River, or somewhere in Provo
I sent out the message:
If you were involved, or even if you weren't, please tell me your version of the time Kellie and Katie drove off a cliff. Be detailed :)
Some foreknowledge :Katie = Kathy -14 yrs Kellie - 15 yrs Dori - 12 yrs Gin=Ginny - 7 yrs David - One-ish
Here is what I got in response:
Katie Fuller
We were driving grandma Murray's big blue car to Louisiana when we were moving to La.
Gin: what about the part about some guy carrying you back up the cliff?Katie Fuller: I don’t remember that?????
Gin: Ok, here's my version . . . . (full of holes since I was a kid at the time)
You guys were in an accident, went off a cliff. Some guy carried you back up the mountain and we went to the hospital. I think there was some excuse about someone's hand was in a brace and couldn’t shift or something, and that's why it went over the cliff. I was not supposed to be in the car with dad, it was packed with household items, etc. But I remember, for whatever reason, my pants were in the car that went over the cliff, and I was riding in dad's car, sitting on a television in my underwear. I remember that mom thought I was dead because dad didn’t mention me, and I lived the nightmare everyone has - I was in public in my underwear! I was pantless at the hospital. (That is all I remember :)
Katie Fuller: I vaguely remember your underwear and the tv, and I remember a guy, but not being carried. It was my arm that was in a brace, but Kellie was driving. Ok, I have thought about it, and I do remember a guy, but I think he carried Kellie up the hill not me??? I don't remember much more than I told you already, sorry.
So now, in comes Mom’s response:Mom:
1984 We were moving back to Louisiana from Utah along with the Murrays
Your Dad was following them so he knew what happened. They were slightly injured but were o.k. I was at Merrill's with plans to fly to Louisiana Ogden , somewhere near Green River . After getting the message Evelyn drove me for hours and hours -- me crying all the way because the message had his voice and he said Kellie and Kathy were o.k. So to me that meant Ginny was not o.k. and was dead. Thank goodness it was just his failure to mention you -- you had been in the station wagon with him but I didn't know that all of you weren't in the same car. Sometime after Kathy told me Kellie had gone off the mountain on purpose. At that time Kellie denied it. But -- at a later time when speaking with Kellie, she said it was sort of intentional. The tow company that the Murrays
Ok, now for Dad’s response, with some minor *harsh* feelings:Dad:
We were all moving from Bountiful Hammond Springfield and Green River . Kelly decided she was being treated unfairly, she wanted to fly not drive for 3 days. It was dark and she could not see the roadside. She decided to wreck the car and then Joyce would let her fly. She turned the wheel and left the road. It turned out that there was about a forty foot drop off. She complained of an injured arm. I took her to the hospital in Springield they put a brace on and said not to use it for a week or two. The Dr. could not see any injury on the x-rays. To this day I don't know if she was really hurt or if it was part of her act so she could fly and not drive. When got to LA some of the supports for the water beds were broken, sure enough those all belonged to grandma Murray
So, after MUCH debate, I finally got Kellie’s version:Kellie:
We were moving to LA and I was driving grandma Murray
Gin: Kellie, that’s not enough. You started with Chris Merrill broke your arm with a waterbed board. More details needed.
Kellie: Loading the car, Chris Merrill hit me in the arm with a waterbed board. My hand was in a brace. I wasn’t old enough to drive, mom and dad taught me how to drive in case there was an emergency since gramma Murray
I think it was somewhere in Provo
Ok, so far, no one has mentioned Dori.Dori:
I was flying with mom and David to La to move. Chris Merrill and Kellie were playing around with a board from Dad’s waterbed, and he swung it around and hit her wrist. She had a soft cast on it. Anyway, we packed everything into an 18 wheeler, even Kellie's gray/orange little car. You and Dad drove one car, Kellie and Kathy drove grandma's boat. I guess I remember Dad saying he was driving with the other two behind him, and when he didn't see them for a while, he turned around and went back to look for them. They had driven over the edge of the mountain and had been stopped by a culvert on the side of the mountain. I don't remember going with Mom to meet you guys, so I must've stayed with David. He was less than 6 months old. I had just turned 13 and we were moving to LA to Galvez. Mom and I had gone to LA earlier in the summer to set up the bingo and stayed with PawPaw Newman. That was when Little David pooped on the bar because he had a diaper rash and the best way to cure it was to let him go without a diaper.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Hormones!
ok, well apparently my hormones are kicking back in. I have officially, according to Nina, become a girl, after 33 years!
last week i bought 5 pairs of shoes, only one of which was tennis shoes. 1 sexy high heel sling back peep toed black satin with a sparkly jewel on the toes (for the cruise dress), one brown wedge mary jane, one wedge heel with silver thingys (yes, i love my use of descriptive words here!), and the big one that EVERYONE at work has commented on, the 3.75 inch brown and white espadril sling back peep toed sandals! Ok, so i can't find a picture of the wedge heels, but here are the rest:
I have also gotten my nails done, french manicure of course. I dyed my horrible multi-colored hair to black, at the request of my hubby. He never told me he like black hair. Everyone tells me it looks great, but I think i am to pale for it. At this point, anything had to be better than the reddish-brownish-greyish it was, especially after that horrible RED fiasco from Brady and Chloë. I think that anything looks better than what it did look like. I will have to take a pic. Also, my hair is longer than it has ever been before, and, gasp, I wore dresses AND jewelry three times in a seven day period! (Granted, two days were for school ceremonies for the kids, and one was a date night, but still!) This is alot for me, if you know me. I have still yet to do the makeup. I don't think that is gonna happen. I also put back in a bunch of my earrings. Still working on getting all of them. (Stupid hospitals make you take out piercing for surgeries!) I am thinking this weekend on my 5 day vacation I will attempt to get the rest back in!
So, i am guessing the meds are putting back the girl hormones that Tate sapped out of me. Gin is coming back!!
last week i bought 5 pairs of shoes, only one of which was tennis shoes. 1 sexy high heel sling back peep toed black satin with a sparkly jewel on the toes (for the cruise dress), one brown wedge mary jane, one wedge heel with silver thingys (yes, i love my use of descriptive words here!), and the big one that EVERYONE at work has commented on, the 3.75 inch brown and white espadril sling back peep toed sandals! Ok, so i can't find a picture of the wedge heels, but here are the rest:
I have also gotten my nails done, french manicure of course. I dyed my horrible multi-colored hair to black, at the request of my hubby. He never told me he like black hair. Everyone tells me it looks great, but I think i am to pale for it. At this point, anything had to be better than the reddish-brownish-greyish it was, especially after that horrible RED fiasco from Brady and Chloë. I think that anything looks better than what it did look like. I will have to take a pic. Also, my hair is longer than it has ever been before, and, gasp, I wore dresses AND jewelry three times in a seven day period! (Granted, two days were for school ceremonies for the kids, and one was a date night, but still!) This is alot for me, if you know me. I have still yet to do the makeup. I don't think that is gonna happen. I also put back in a bunch of my earrings. Still working on getting all of them. (Stupid hospitals make you take out piercing for surgeries!) I am thinking this weekend on my 5 day vacation I will attempt to get the rest back in!
So, i am guessing the meds are putting back the girl hormones that Tate sapped out of me. Gin is coming back!!
Ok, so here goes ...
totally playing with blogs today. never done this, and i don't think anyone really cares, but here goes. everyone who knows me well, knows i used to write silly random crap. There were websites, I'm Bored Newsletters, etc. Lets see if i can think of anything to blog about. The rest of the world seems to be able to do it. Maybe i can get some news out there since i am such a hermit and i hate phone calls, and not everyone in my life has jumped on the email bandwagon yet. I would so much rather get an email than a phone call.
So here is the first one. Short and sweet.
later
So here is the first one. Short and sweet.
later
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)